It is scary how much I make sense when I write and how little I can clearly communicate verbally. I am slowly realizing my life belongs behind a keyboard.
It is so nice outside tonight, I wish it could stay like this all year long!
Do you think it to be horrible that I use the 
as the icon for a folder marked Inspiration?
You may find yourself asking yourself this very question one day? What do you think? Why was Van Gogh so good?
I really hate February in Michigan. This was taken on a day when the sun actually came out for a while.
In other news work has been rather pissing me off lately. I have to get a better job soon. I don’t make any money there and the guy that owns the place is from the stone age. I started calling Monday “New Rule Monday” because every Monday, he made up a new rule! I had a dream the other day that I was in the office at Amtote and the guy that fired me was cracking jokes. I was sitting in the chair spinning around in circles and laughing. Thinking about how weird it would be to work here again. Your mind has a sick way of playing tricks on you and not reminding you how miserable of a place it was.
I was reading a book with Kay and after looking at a certain artist she yelled that I did not understand his message. The message according to her was that emotions are islands in the sea of life and that we thrive on those islands and drowned in the sea. Whatever the hell that is supposed to mean?
I have this dream about once a month. The scene and characters are always changing, but the theme is always the same. I am either with my family or by myself but every time I am traveling to Amsterdam again. Last night I had a dream I just took off without letting anyone know where I was going. I remember getting off the plane and seeing my manager Lee from work. I stopped at her Cafe a moment to talk about what I was going to do. Seeing her face was the most welcoming site ever. Just then I realized I had not called Lilyan(or anyone) to let them know that I was in Europe.
PS: If this makes no sense it is either because it doesn’t or I am drunk. Fuck it, I will edit this later
#34346585
I am at a Taco Bell(or what looks like one) with Lilyan during lunch break. We stand in line for what seems like 15 minutes before we even get to order. A half hour passes and still no food. I start yelling at the women behind the counter and Lilyan is calling me an asshole and holding me back. I realize I should have been back at work 5 minutes ago.
#3423445566 (2 nights ago)
I am at a NIN concert with Lilyan and we pay $80 for tickets. Upon walking up to the desk they tell me I must wait on a list before I am able to enter. I start to get angry with the staff and flip over their desk. I run outside and scream FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK at the top of my lungs. I get dizzy and fall over in the parking lot of what looks like a Home Depot.
I had a very strange dream last night and it goes a little something like this. I was walking around in this city I have never been to before. My dreams mostly take place in this city, but most of the time it is a strange twilight and not daylight. Snow was on the ground but it was not snowing and the sun was out. I stepped inside a church, not really sure why. I walked in and the smell of incense and bacon filled my nose. I walked down the stairs and looked down to see I had on shorts and a t-shirt. I asked gods pardon as I walked into the church and found a seat. Fast forward to me exiting the church, I discover that I have been shot in the leg. I can’t recall how or who shot me, I think it was someones-hand-shot-me-through-the-crack-in-the-door type of shooting. I am not really worried about my injury because it does not hurt and it is not bleeding even thought the bullet has clearly gone all the way through. I try walking home but start to loose my way walking down Six Mile. All along the road is a mess of CVS, Target, and a bank that I don’t recognize. I curse at how far away my home is and how everything is being swallowed up by middle American strip malls. I walk into the CVS and talk to a black women behind the counter about band aids. I look down and my leg has a cork in the hole where the bullet blasted through. No need for a band aid anymore
I am in a house with a nice view of a lake. The light is shinning off the surface of the lake like it is mid day. I am at a party and many old friends who I have not seen in years are there. Larry Tylyki(sp) is making fun of Mike Ryan the way he always used to. I think my friend Dan Massa is somewhere in this house. Lots of assorted characters from my High School days. I am sitting on a couch in front of a huge bay window looking out at the lake. The couch becomes the front seat of a horse drawn carriage and I am traveling down a dirt road. My passenger is Mary Alice who is in some form of distress.
I had a few more, but forgot the rest.
no idea why I am having such a flood of dreams lately. It seems to happen like that for me, I have dreams every night for weeks and then nothing for weeks.
I am at a wedding at a bowling alley that is for my dad and my aunt Nancy. My mom and the entire family is their. I am the only one pissed off and unable to look at my dad. Everyone is telling me I should be happy, but I don’t understand why. My cousin Ryan comes up to me and says to me that he won’t be in town long enough for us to hang out.
I am sleeping under a tarp in a snow covered landscape. All I have to separate me from the snow is a plastic bag and a blanket I keep over my head. I am with 2 other people and one had forgotten his boots. It is so cold that the rats are trying to get inside my blanket to keep warm. I flick them off into the water and watch them freeze solid. Damn rats keep trying to steal my food.
Do my dreams ever make sense? NO!!
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